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Meditation for Healing Relationship Tension or Creating, Strengthening or Maintaining Healthy Boundaries

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This meditation can be used for the difficult situations with others that you may not have much control over (situations where two people are sharing space; relationships that have a high amount of stress or tension; instances of abuse; and also can be used for strengthening bonds between two people). Stay with each part of the meditation for as long as you feel it necessary. Stop and write any important insights as they come up.

You do not need to do every part of the meditation, and feel free to use any portion of it at any time separate from the rest of the meditation if you find it useful - for example when the phone rings and you need to have a conversation with a difficult family member, or each time they enter the room it’s good to imagine your energy field being filled with your own energy.

  • Start with 3-5 slow long deep relaxing breaths;
  • Visualize an inner sanctuary in your mind;
  • Imagine standing within a circle of stones or crystals in a clearing on the ground.
  • If you would like to - you may welcome any guides, angels, helpful ancestors, or other supportive entities, to lend their assistance, in this area of your life.
  • Picture waves of pure love washing down over you from Creator; activating your Heart Center... and pure love energy flowing forth from the very center of your entire being.
  • Imagine connecting your heart center energy with the groundedness of the center of Mother Earth.
  • The melding together of Creator, Mother Earth and Heart Center energy creating a magnificent flowing force field of grounded healing energy within, and around your entire body, and energy field. It’s as if you are filling your aura or energy field up with only your energy and pushing out anything that does not belong there.
  • Invite to your healing circle the person(s) (one at a time, or as a group) that you feel you have tension with, and ask to communicate with the individual(s’) higher self/soul/inner being.
  • Imagine that in this circle between the two of you is a dividing line.  With an imaginary wall coming up from the line dividing the circle completely in half - yourself on one side and them on the other.
  • Imagine gathering up everything that belongs to the other person - any anger, shame, blame, sadness or anything else belonging to that person - and placing it on their side of the invisible line. (They may have divine assistance to support them in taking care of it if you would like to imagine this as well; however, it is okay if you imagine dumping it on them, or throwing it at them - we are reclaiming our power here - so whatever comes to mind for you IS the healthiest thing.)
  • Invite them to put onto your side anything they may have taken on that belonged to you. (Your own divine guidance is assisting you as well in taking care of whatever does belong to you.) Take back now any responsibilities you have placed onto this person for being a source of happiness for you; any blame, shame, guilt or anger you have ever thrown their way.
  • Share with them any messages you have for them.
  • The boundary line between you now becomes an invisible wall allowing only loving positive energies to cross - you can hug or send love, but no negative energies or responsibilities that belong to the other person can cross to either side. You can imagine that strengthening now if you would like to.
  • Set the intention now and say in your mind, or out loud:  "I now only allow positive energies to flow between myself and this person."
  • You can imagine that there is a wide vortex of positive energy flowing between yourself and this person, across the boundary line and wall, where you share love and gratitude.
  • Within this vortex you can notice if there are any discrepancies - any grey chords connected between the two of you with negative karma, energy from past memories, from negative experiences in this lifetime, or a past. Allow them to be cut - cutting those chords while still maintaining any positive connections from the outer wide vortex that surrounds.
  • Also imagine enveloping this person with an energy of unconditional acceptance if you are ready to do that. Complete and total acceptance of where they are no matter what that place of development is for them. Knowing that they are not responsible for your happiness and that they do not need to change anything for you to be happy within yourself.
 
  • Optionally - If you are ready you can choose to say the following (in any order) to that person's higher being:
  • I'm sorry - for any tension that does or may have existed between us at all, in this lifetime or past.
  • Please forgive me - if ever my soul required tension between us to learn and grow from. My new intention now is that we learn and grow together without any tension between us.
  • Thank you - 1. For any sacrifices you may have had to make for us to learn and grow together, and  2. For being a part of my learning experience.
  • I love you - the light in me loves the light in you that is source energy.  
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  • Invite that person's higher self to come down now into their human body - requesting that mind, body and spirit merge to be present in whatever dealing you may have with this individual (or that they may extend to others); while remembering that your happiness and enjoyment does not depend upon this person’s actions at all.
  • Welcome your own higher self to come down now into your human body - requesting that mind, body and spirit merge to be present in your life and relationships.
  • Share with that person one last time anything you want to share with them, anything you might want them to know.
  • Ask them if there is anything they would like for you to know.
  • Know that this person is currently doing the best they possibly can with what they have been given, taught, shown, and experienced, up until this very point in their existence.
  • Imagine now that from across the boundary line the light within your hearts now joins with the light in the center of their heart - becoming one with one another sharing in the life fore energy that creates and sustains us all.
  • When you're ready you can close down the meditation:
    • Dismiss them from the healing circle and detach your energy from theirs - allowing them to be on their way, and both of you to move forward now;
    • Imagine waves of pure love energy washing down over your body for as long as you wish;
    • Cleanse your healing circle with waves of pure energy;
    • Bring those feelings of pure joy into all areas of your life.

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    Jenna writes Q&A format letters filled with guidance on incorporating mindfulness, ownership and personal growth in our interactions with the world. 

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